4 Types of People
There are those …
who do not know, but think that they know,
who do not know, that they know,
who know, what they do not know,
who know, that they know.
The first one can be classified, as a fool while the second one requires our awakening. Enliven him and he will surely progress. The third one usually going out - seeking for truth and if we can teach him he can definitely benefit accordingly.
Finally we have to acquire the knowledge from the fourth one who can inspire us to grow and gain the goodness in life.
"Good Companionship is the whole of the spiritual life." -- the Buddha. ~ S.V:2 ~
It is the beginning and forerunner of all the Goodness in life because it provides the supporting condition for its' growth.
Have you ever pondered how a good friend comes into your life? Does it come by chance? What about the purpose of friendship? Is it a company to pass time with? Is it a place where you can pour your problems on?
Did you take friendship for granted, as our friend change from time to time as we grow? Who do you think are the main factors that motivate and encourage our spiritual urgency to manifest?
In this second formula of Having Friendship we shall explore the elements and the various method of strengthening them.
Module 3 : FRIENDS & FRIENDSHIP (1)
You can't lift by yourselves …
The main purpose of friendship is for us to grow mutually. As we grow, they grow and when they grow, we continue to grow.
With a good friendship, one has company when in need. One is guided when in lost and one gains more encouragement when glory comes to him.
While seeking friendship, one should not push for it, as it is a slow grooming process and not an overnight task. It requires a long-term investment of time, patience, understanding and trust.
A true friendship is irrespective of age, sex, race, religion, country etc.
You can't lift by yourselves …
The main purpose of friendship is for us to grow mutually. As we grow, they grow and when they grow, we continue to grow.
With a good friendship, one has company when in need. One is guided when in lost and one gains more encouragement when glory comes to him.
While seeking friendship, one should not push for it, as it is a slow grooming process and not an overnight task. It requires a long-term investment of time, patience, understanding and trust.
A true friendship is irrespective of age, sex, race, religion, country etc.
1. Element of Kalyana-mitta
(Spiritual Friendship)
Dhammasanghani, 1328 ~ A.V:47 ~
A friend encourages us to grow and improve in the elements that we lack such as faith, generosity, virtue, knowledge and wisdom. Therefore he must be a person full of …
a. Faith (saddha)-
He is confident in moral, spiritual and the intellectual aspect. He is also trustworthy and able to carry himself. He is able to inspire, motivate and give strength to others.
b. Virtue (Sila)
He is one who is upright in his conduct and well disciplined such as observing the 5 precepts. He does not have any ulterior motives when he befriends you and he does not lie. He possesses the ability to console and advice others.
c. Charitable (Caga)
He is liberal and generous. He gives without expectations or attachments. He does not crave for your wealth and he practices charity not only from his pocket but also through his speech, time, effort, attention, etc.
d. Knowledgeable / Wisdom (Panna)
He develops wisdom that leads to non-greed, non-hatred and non-delusion. He is a practical man and not merely talk.
2. Expectations of a Good Friend
In the Layman Code of Discipline (Sigalovada Sutta), the Buddha laid down the following duties of a friend: A good friend shall …
i. Protect you when you are heedless.
ii. Protect your property when you are heedless.
iii. Become a refuge when you are in danger
iv. Do not forsake you when in danger
v. Be considerate towards your descendents
The Buddha also defined the fundamental qualities of a warm-hearted friend. A Real Friend is …
i. A friend who helps …
He guards the heedless and protects their wealth. He becomes a refuge when you are afraid and when the need arises; he provides you with more then the amount required.
ii. A friend who shares the same weal and woe …
He will confess his own secrets to you and never reveal your secret to others. He will not forsake you during misfortune and even sacrifices his life for the goodness of his friend.
iii. A friend who gives good counsel …
He dissuades you from doing evil and persuades you to do good. He makes you hear what you have not heard such as the truth and the Teachings of the Buddha and points out to you the road to heavens.
iv. A friend who sympathizes …
He does not rejoice in your misfortune but rather for your prosperity. He restrains others from speaking evil of you (defending your weaknesses) and praises to those who speak well of you (who spread your goodness).
A True friend is one who is following closely to the right way while he secretly concerns his friend's welfare. In misfortune he will console you and he always gives good advice. Most of all he know how to keep your secrets.
